Okay. I have not been here in what? Nine months? >.<
I will not even try to remember the emoticon codes.
I'm deeply sorry for disappointing anyone who expected me to be back (sooner). I hate this trait of mine very much because it seems as though I do not value others the way I do...
DeviantART made me feel pressured (to draw and to do it well) and pressure only does one thing to me: it makes me run. I have run away from other places, situations and people in my life for that same reason and I know myself that this is not the way to deal with it, but for the time being I can't help it.
Coming back here for this entry is one step into the right direction, I hope.
Seriously: I hate any kind of competition. It wrecks me up completely and takes away the confidence I need to draw.
I am cleaning up this account a little bit. It would be nice to come back here for real, or at least for the occasional picture. I doubt very much that this will be a social focal point for me again though. T-T But maybe it's not necessarily meant to be, anyway.
Again, I am truly sorry for staying away like this. I don't think that an apology can make it better but I will apologize regardless, because I mean it~